Sunday, June 12, 2005

They Shoot Horses Don't They?

I've never been a believer in astrology - the western ideal of sun sign astrology. Even as a kid it made no sense to me that every Geminian on the planet would be having the kind of day outlined for me in the 'Daily Horoscope' column of the newspaper. And the astrologer would draw with such broad strokes that obviously he/she was going to be correct for some Geminian somewhere on the planet at some point.

In my teens, however, I discovered Chinese astrology. Not for them the concept that all Geminians are carbon copies of one another. No, they work in years - maybe something to do with their culture being ancient or something, they've got more time to play with. The Chinese work in 12 year cycles, with each of those 12 years being devoted to an animal. When they've run through all twelve creatures of the Chinese zodiac they start over with the first animal on the 13th year, and so on and so forth. I was born under the sign of the Tiger, which makes much more sense to me than I'd comfortably admit. I can be brave and fearless when someone threatens my cubs. I can also work frenetically in short bursts (consider the Tiger chasing down its prey), but I'm also lazy and need lots of long naps to recover from all of that activity. The list goes on. The Chinese zodiac can be married to the western zodiac which tempers the signs. For example, I'm a Gemini Tiger which means certain of my attributes are going to be at the fore - the communication part of it, for instance. A Virgoan Tiger might enjoy having a REALLY tidy den, where I'm happy to live in piggery. But underneath we're both Tigers.

My children are a Snake and a Horse and fit their attributes well. Tiger parents and Horse children are supposed to be a great match, which is true. I understand my little horse on levels where I don't understand my little snake.

The problem comes thusly: The love of my life is also a Horse. This is obvious when you see the two of them frolicking in a paddock. Or in their case hunched around a video game. But it's never more obvious than when you see them rearing up and kicking one another to try and figure out who is the boss horse in the corral. Of course, little horse's age doesn't help much. He's 14 going on 21. That would make him ornery in anyone's reckoning. It's also the age - teetering on the edge of manhood - where if he were a colt he'd be testing the mettle of the surrounding stallions in that time honored attempt to be the head of the herd. The head stallion, on the other hand, just sees an upstart little baby horse trying to usurp his position and feels it's his station in life to thwart every possible attempt at getting the upper hoof. This always winds up the same way, with the two of them happily sharing a bale of hay and cantering around the paddock.

But the posturing in the meantime is exceedingly difficult to take. Read back to Tiger attributes. Threatening one of my cubs makes me turn into some kind of ubertiger with sharp, sharp fangs and claws all set to rip out your brain by way of your intestines.

I try. I try to stay neutral. I try to stay out of the head butting and away from the flailing hooves, but the whinnying drives me insane. The big horse and I discuss this in more rational moments.

HORSE: He should respect me and not answer back when I tell him to do things.
ME: Then you shouldn't let yourself get caught up in arguments with him. If you let him have the last word, he will. He's you..but younger.
That's what I say. What the actual unspoken dialogue between us is:
HORSE: He should respect me and not answer back (because I'm the only one allowed to have the last word and I can go on and on and on even after he's not allowed to say anything else because I've told him to shut up. That's because I'm the boss and I need to make sure that I don't just WIN but WIN BIG)
ME: Then you shouldn't let yourself get caught up in arguments with him. (Because you're as bad as he is). If you let him have the last word, he will. (And that last word usually will be some kind of expletive tossed over his shoulder before he stomps off to his room). He's you...but younger. (He's my cub...and no matter what I might say NOW while I'm calm and rational, I'm going to hate you if you try and force your authority (pick on him) or insist that he does things without question (pick on him) and hurt his little self-esteem (pick on him).
Today, the horses went at it again. Baby horse didn't do what he was supposed to do or do it quickly or quietly enough for big horse. Big horse immediately pulls the card I'd given him the night before and tells him to stop arguing right now. Baby horse mumbles and does as requested. Big horse then takes advantage of the lull to tell baby horse why he should be listening to big horse etc. etc. (WIN BIG), and baby horse tosses expletive over shoulder and heads for a different part of the pasture. (His room). This would ordinarily have ended with both of them cooling off in various parts of the field and then coming together for a communal feed from the hay bale.
Only today was different. Today big horse came into the room to rehash what I had just heard through the walls. Only big horse's tale was slanted to make big horse look better. This brought out the Tiger in me with full force and I said some REALLY MEAN THINGS! Only they didn't seem mean at the time when they were being delivered with righteous tiger anger. At the time they seemed like a good alternative to ripping out his brain by way of his intestines with my SHARP SHARP TIGER CLAWS. So big horse left to find baby horse. Only baby horse wasn't in the pasture. AT ALL. Baby horse had jumped the fence and gone off to join the circus or something. Of course, he arrived back later after running wild and free for a while. By which time big horse was off licking his tiger wounds in the stable (the games room).
So now the two horses are happily sharing a bale of hay and I'm the mean evil tiger person who gave the big horse nasty nasty tiger holes in the abdomen with my mean and nasty tiger words.
And the little snake is sunning herself on a rock and wisely keeping well out of the way.
They shoot horses don't they?.....

2 Comments:

Blogger job opportunitya said...

I peep the web for blogs just like this one.
Airtight blog. Your site was off the chain and I will
return!
No matter when you are, just stop by and check for my no load life insurance blog site.

5:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Your about to learn how to know who you can trust. Remove negative thinking and free tarot card reading...Easily see where your life is heading....free tarot card reading

2:38 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home